Saturday, December 31, 2011

..reflection...


wrote this yesterday:
on the plane, somewhere over Quebec, about an hour left on this flight..
listening to music on my iPad , thinking about the last 2 weeks and tomorrow night, with the music making it's way deep into my soul..
wondering if it is a blessing or a curse to feel as deeply as I do... I always have.......sometimes I think it would be easier to be more superficial, able to compartmentalize, not to be sooo in touch with my feelings... must be less exhausting, then again, I would never want to trade my deep feelings of joy, of closeness with God and with people for something else... if I was not feeling things like I do I wouldn't have the deep connections I have with the people I love...
learned a while ago that this is called the "affection of Jesus", so really, it is a gift rather than a curse, yes, definitely a blessing... the deep sadness is what comes with it, the price that has to be paid.... I guess it is like roses have thorns...
believing that God put our personalities together on purpose, for a purpose, I am okay with the way I feel pain..
reflecting on the last 2 weeks... with a thankful attitude.. I can say that it was very nice at times, definitely lots of time to relax and read, fun with the kids and good times even as a big family... the conflicts definitely less than other times..thanks be to God, ... so over all it was a good trip...  it remains a fact that in this world we will have troubles, but He definitely has overcome the world...
it was nice to be able to spend time in this corner of the world, beautiful mountains, sunshine and snow.. skiing still works.. ;) definitely enjoyed  that everyone was healthy and we did not have to spend our days in the hospital like the last 2 times I was there, such a blessing my mother’s health has been restored, another reason to thank God......
a few more days and life will be back to normal, looking forward to going back to work, daily prayer meetings with my beloved sisters in Christ... tons to do ..and that  is a very good thing..... He is blessing me... and I am so thankful....

it is morning right now in Canada..after a night in my own bed... I am praising God... because He is worthy to be praised... that will NEVER change..

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