Sunday, September 25, 2011

.... knitted together in the mother's womb....

..today was a tough day, tough stuff to learn about and absorb, disturbing facts and information... leaving after a day of volunteer training exhausted and yet more assured that this team is a match made in heaven.. blessed and thankful.. bonding on a deeper level..
holding the little 10 week old fetus (one of our beautiful fetal models) in my hands while watching some of those videos...don't know why I did that but I was comforted by it, as if I was protecting it from what we learned about... how these little human beings are ripped out of their mother's uterus.. praying that by God's grace we will be instruments he will use to stop this from happening... sharing information and educating women and empowering them to make a better informed decision.. ultimately it is up to Him, He is the One who needs to change the hearts of those poor women, who are overwhelmed by the gravity of the situation  they are finding themselves in... compassion and such a burden for everyone facing this is weighing down my heart...
 no surprise that "everyday, mundane life" seems a little too much coming home.. the cloud of sadness and loneliness descending the moment I enter this house... a family consisting of an angry, unhappy teenager and me... a single parent, assaulted by just that fact.. "single parent"... when did I sign up for that? don't recall this..
God's goodness so evident all day... still there, just maybe hidden behind the Eeyore cloud???
opening up about some of the hurts today... should I be surprised I am being assaulted by the enemy as I am sitting here all by myself... seems that is what I am doing most evenings these days... usually this is more than fine... just today... not so fine...
exciting to be part of something that is apparently angering the enemy in such a way that he is using the most obvious things in our lives.. babies not sleeping through the night, dogs throwing up and loneliness... ha... you have to come up with other ways of discouraging us... because... this is NOT going to stop us, called by Him who is more than able to do whatever he calls us to do through us... we will be victorious, by His grace and His strength... just having to lean in a little deeper... snuggling a little closer into the embrace of the Lover of my Soul... the Saviour... Our Lord Jesus Christ... Praise be to Him !!!!