last night I was not allowed downstairs.. my girls were busy baking my cake and decorating the Birthday table for me.... with presents, flowers and candy.... they are such a blessing...
having a birthday on a Sunday is especially nice... as I was standing with everyone, worshipping God , my kids all standing beside me, I thanked Him for the way He does care, how He has been there for me always... my whole life, even when I didn't really know Him yet... trusting Him for our future is not that hard considering His faithfulness throughout my life.
the sermon was about suffering and why it happens... I know all this... I accept it, and I know that it is really about eternal life with Him... I know that doing what is right, forgiving, reconciling and not retaliating and sinning is pleasing my Saviour and is also portraying to those around me who He really is... that it is He who has been and continues to give me the grace and peace that makes it possible for me to live the way I do... our pastor kept on asking: "is it worth it?" and yes, I would say it is... right now it might look that I am losing out... I am not the one happily engaged and living the life.... I am the one who carries the burden of this broken family... and still.... it is worth it to me... because I love Him... and He loves me... for eternity.... that's all that counts..
