...Franklin, what is it about you?????

I am not sure why this is, but I cannot stop smiling as soon as I step foot on Tennessee soil.. even if it is just that thing that connects the terminal with the plane.. ( no idea what you call this in English.. sorry)
I am so happy to be here I can hardly contain myself.. I have no idea why....
this is my second time here and I feel like I am coming home... know my way around the airport, the Starbucks in the terminal, the Thrifty Car Rental place... found the way to Franklin and my hotel with no problems, in the dark and in the rain!!!!!!!!!!!
oh, and I got the cutest car... I always get a free upgrade... aren't those people just so amazing here???
so, it is a red Sportage and I love it...
went to Publix and got a few things to munch on last night... then I settled down in my hotel room... and.. I still can't stop smiling.. someone tell me why?
met with my friend Michelle for Breakfast at the Cracker Barrel.. Christian Bookstore, and then.. the Mall...a little Christmas shopping for my girlies... found my way back... yes..  still smiling..
tomorrow morning I will go take care of some business and then have 2 meetings in the afternoon...
I feel so very very blessed that I can be here, and look, it is not about Michael W Smith or even the few people I know around here..
because I missed my flight on Saturday I didn't get to see Mary (VERY SAD about that, Mary.. I love you)... and because it was supposed to snow here ( oolala... disaster!!!!!) another friend cancelled his plans to come see me here today...
anyways.. will go to the Opryland Hotel with Michelle, her daughter and Granddaughter tonite.. I am told it is beautifully decorated for Christmas...
and I am smiling....
God is so very good to me, I am just so excited to be here and I am enjoying being alone.. yes.. I am not lonely, I am happy to be doing and accomplishing what I am, and I am great company for myself..this is not me at all 2 years ago, I have come such a long way.. all because my Redeemer loves me, all because He delights over me with singing... He has quieted me with His love when the going was so very tough, and He won't stop blessing me..... I had that vision of Him in a nice soft light blue and white striped shirt, so very, very soft, like Ralph Lauren is making them, He was holding me in His arms and I was just nestling my head against His shoulder / chest ( and hearing His heart beat) one morning during that Alaska Cruise in July 2010... when I was still so raw from all the pain and sorrow... He has been my close companion ever since, so I am sharing with Him this time down here, He is as excited as I am... ( it's because He loves me), He also doesn't mind shopping... yup, He goes with me even there... :)
what else can a crazy girl like me ask for?????
going to a nice get together tomorrow night at 6, just found out about that ... home again on Thursday...
and that is a great thing too...
I love my girls, my puppies, my friends, my work, my church and that He always goes along with me, He will never leave me, ignore me or forsake me, He won't even get angry or annoyed, impatient or disappointed... He just loves me and spurs me on, encourages me and transforms me into His likeness..
He is the GREATEST!!!!!!!!! ( and maybe, just maybe, one day I will get to share this with that godly man that I know He has for me... YAY!!!)

... tenderness and care....

it is a funny thing... I think God has a huge sense of humour.. there I am on Saturday morning writing about that we make plans but God is the One who calls the shots... did He have a reminder of that for me...
so even though I was up early, very early, was ready to go early enough to make my flight, early enough to celebrate my daughter's birthday, the way we always do... in the morning, opening gifts and all...
I still missed my flight by one minute... one minute too late to make the cut off which is one hour for flights to the US....
now, I am someone who hates to have to rush and take a chance... especially when it is an airplane we have to catch... I rather be there early and take my time.. for some unexplainable reason all of a sudden I became very relaxed,  changing the time I had to leave in my head and enjoyed the time with my daughters... I never thought I was risking not getting there on time.. I don't know, maybe my cold made me all foggy in my brain...

anyways, God has plans, and I guess He knew that I would come home and just collapse in my bed never to be seen again that day... I am still sick and so thankful I did not have to be on a flight, spend time with a friend, drive another 3 hours to see another friend... all of this would have been a great thing, a wonderful thing, something I planned assuming I would be healthy and strong... but my God knew I needed a rest..
so I am still in bed, still feeling really weak and tired,  it is such a good thing my flight is now booked for Monday afternoon.. I am still going to be there in time for the "business part", the friend time has been cut short, but that's okay... because I now have another "free" ticket to go some other time... thanks to a very generous and extremely helpful Ex-husband.... and can go there again sometime before September 28, 2012...
So, His plans are perfect... He just gave me another experience to prove that.. I am trying to make wise plans and decisions with whatever my resources are at the time.. He however is soooooooo much bigger than circumstances or anything "unsuspected" that comes my way... NEED to remember that....

Makes my heart overflow with gratitude and love, and... makes my passion to share Him so much greater too... want everyone around me to know Him like this.. ( my Ex-husband included..)
Thankful for the rest, it was very much needed.. can you believe how much He cares,
the Lover of my soul ? I will praise Him forever!!!!

... where you go, I will go...

up really early, 4:30...all packed and ready.. birthday table set up for my now 21 year old daughter... sick with a cold.. but looking forward to spending some time in Franklin Tennessee again.. I just love it there...
catching up with 3 of my wonderful friends down there and just drinking in the Southern hospitality will be amazing..

never knew much of Tennessee until actually about 18 months ago when I came back from the Michael W Smith and friends Cruise in July 2010... I remember figuring out that "everyone" ( all the artists on the cruise) were living there.. checking it all out online I started to think how cool it would be to live there one day... in the mean time I have been there twice already, made some great friends there ...
the Adoption Agency / Pregnancy Care Center in Nashville is called "Miriam's promise" when I first googled that and saw the name I cried... mind you, I cried a lot back then..
anyways.. with my life so up in the air I wondered if this was where I would end up maybe...

I love the Word, I am so amazed that He would communicate with us like this...
Proverbs 3: 5+6 says this:

Trust in the LORD with all your heart 

   and lean not on your own understanding; 

 in all your ways submit to him, 

   and he will make your paths straight.

I remember the times last year when I didn't know where I belonged anymore, my security and all I had known had come to an end.. it was a very unsettled place to be in.. but God had a plan, and I trusted Him..

He showed me where my place was right there and then and that's all I needed to know..

This week, I learned another important thing in this regard.. 

waiting on the Lord and trusting Him for His provision and care, Him being Jehovah Jireh, the God who provides.. when He will bring this man He has for me into my life, I am to go where he will go... like Ruth told Naomi in the book of Ruth 1:16 : 

Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God.

wow... so, the plans He has for me are that detailed.. when this little train called Miriam was thrown up in the air , even though it came as a surprise for me, He knew it all along and considered it to be something good for me.. when I was wondering where I would end up He had already decided that I was going to be staying here for the time being... for my future He already knows where I need to be one day.. so waiting on Him means to not lean on my own understanding but to trust Him with all my heart, submit to Him and He will make my path straight...isn't that what He has always done?

I am thankful for the way He continues to reveal things to me... HE ROCKS, that's all I can say... 

 getting on this plane today I will just enjoy what He has for me right now... and leave the planning up to Him..

.....waiting on the Lord......

patience.. a fruit of the spirit..
be still and know that I am God... waiting on the Lord...
what a great exercise...
need to exercise this since I am not that good at it... :(
much better than I used to be, no question about that, but not good at it, not good enough at it... that's why the lessons continue to be ..WAIT....

so against all this world is and stands for.. instant gratification seems to be the mantra of today's society, I am waiting...


remember the letters send by stage coach.. ( long before our time) but even when I was a child in Germany, my pen pal and I sent letters back and forth every other day... today, we txt, email, FaceTime or Skype and we are instantly connected..

I am someone who loves to communicate, I do it a lot with my friends.. or my kids...

you want a new fridge, car, computer... today we have credit cards, lines of credit or the store offers to let us pay for it a year later..

we have stores that are open 24 hours and whatever we think we need is at our fingertips at all times..
I remember my oldest losing the last soother we had for her on a Saturday afternoon, back when we were still living in Germany... stores closed at 1pm and none were open on Sundays.... we had a rough night, took her a while to finally fall asleep without her beloved "schnulli" but... she got over it.. by the time stores opened again Monday morning she was a "big girl" who didn't need a soother anymore..

ha.... waiting on the Lord, He knows why He makes us wait... we grow up in the waiting, we learn to trust Him more and let go of our perceived needs .. apparently we can "survive" without what we thought we so desperately needed ... actually, if I am looking at my life... the last 2 years.. had I been able to flee and hide in the "comfort" of a new relationship, I would have missed out , all my relying on Him, finding my strength in Him and not in the arms of an understanding, loving man.. knowing Him and how He was holding me when I was in such pain, even making it from one day to the next was a huge struggle... I would not have known His tenderness,  how much He loves me and cares about me, I wouldn't have known how He heals and builds up, how His faithfulness is what carried me through those times..

Each breath I take waiting on Him is a blessing. each day that goes by I am walking a bit closer with Him.. waiting on Him, surrendering my needs, I get a new glimpse of what heaven will be like one day.. undisturbed fellowship with the One who made me, the One who saved me..
living He loved me, dying He saved me, buried He carried my sins far away, rising He justified, freely forever....one day He's coming, oh glorious day...

and... another thing.. how exhilarating it is to finally get what you have been waiting for... especially if you surrendered this to Him..  learned the most important lesson, that He is all we need..
looking forward to it  :)

.. trusting and surrendering...

to surrender:
To yield; to give up; to resign in favor of another; as,to surrender a right or privilege; to surrender a place or an office.
Trust:

Confidence; a reliance or resting of the mind on the integrity, veracity, justice, friendship or other sound principle of another person.

Such big words... thinking and meditating on these today...

How quick we are to say we are surrendering our will, our life to the Lord...

How easy it is to say we trust Him in all that happens..

thinking of surrendering... yielding my perceived right ( or even ability ) to control what's happening in my life... only possible if I trust...

surrendering my will and all that matters to me to God.. cannot do that if I do not trust Him... 

when the rubber hits the road, when a loved one's health is failing, when things are scary and potentially difficult and hurtful... IF we are living what we are claiming is true for us we will not worry, we will not be anxious... we will not fret... we will not be confused, we will not be trying to manipulate or control what is happening around us... we will stand with arms open wide . our eyes and hearts focused on our Redeemer..

it is in Him alone that our hope is found.. it is in His more than capable, loving and forever caring hands our future lies.. ( and isn't that the BEST place for it???)

it is very interesting what God uses to move us on from one level of maturity to the next. it is not always the heavy and traumatic.. it could be something really good.. a blessing... 

it shouldn't surprise me that, considering He knows my heart,  He puts His finger exactly on the spot where the next growth has to happen...

it is so easy to sing "I surrender All" on a Sunday morning.. and we DID sing this  on Sunday, how funny is that.. living it minute to minute every day.. that's where the challenge lies.

it is a fact of living the life of a follower of Christ that He is never done shaping us and molding us, transforming us into His likeness... no matter what it takes..

because it is not about what my desires and wishes are, it is about aligning my life with Him so that I can be fulfilling my calling in this life. to bring glory to His name... 

To do that I need to trust Him... and trusting Him I only can if I know who I am putting my trust into..  thankfully He has given us the Word, it is there where we meet Him if we seek Him with all our heart.. each time we trust it will become easier... this is because one of His characteristics is that He is FAITHFUL... what a rare , yet most important trait... what a blessing... experienced it so many times..

a feeling of warmth and safety, a feeling we so long for , all of us, can be found in the arms of Him.. to know Him is to love Him, to know Him is to be protected and sheltered. To know Him is to enjoy communion with the One who made us... sweet fellowship, never to be taken away... and there... again, this is what it is all about...

Great... thanks Lord for making this clear... I needed this today  :)

... listening to lies... hmmm, better not...

discouraged today... listening to someone ugly whispering in my ears... shouldn't I know better than doing that?
but then again...I am in good company ... David... listen to what he had to say:

Give ear to my prayer, O God; 

And do not hide Yourself from my supplication. 

 Give heed to me and answer me; 

I am restless in my complaint and am surely distracted, 

 Because of the voice of the enemy, 

Because of the pressure of the wicked; 

For they bring down trouble upon me 

And in anger they bear a grudge against me.

  My heart is in anguish within me, 

And the terrors of death have fallen upon me. 

 Fear and trembling come upon me, 

And horror has overwhelmed me. 

 I said, “Oh, that I had wings like a dove! 

I would fly away and be at rest. 

 “Behold, I would wander far away, 

I would lodge in the wilderness. 

discussing this this morning during our prayer time we chuckled about David... what a funny idea... to fly away as a dove.. where to? in the storm? finding lodging in the wilderness?? Seriously????????

A glimpse of longings fulfilled like NEVER before... a high... and then.. no surprise.. falling... insecurities coming to the surface.. and there he is.... the deceiver...

so.. looking up one of my own Psalms.. I am choosing to believe in what I know is truth:

I praise you oh Lord,

For You have enlightened my eyes

I can see the immeasurable riches 

Of my inheritance in You

Oh Lord I praise You

For You have given me a spirit of wisdom and knowledge

Through you I am able to discern

I can live a life that brings glory to You oh Lord

I praise You, oh Lord

For You have redeemed my life from the darkness

You have brought me out of the darkness into Your marvellous light

You broke the chains of sin and gave me freedom

Freedom to choose not to sin

Freedom to follow You

Freedom to love like You

Freedom to praise You and worship You all of my life

I praise You oh Lord 

For You have given me eternal life 

You have prepared a room for me in Your mansion 

You are always with me

Your rod and Your staff they comfort me 

You are my refuge and my rock

With You I can do everything

Without You I cannot do anything 

You are the lover of my soul

Your love is faithful and everlasting 

Your love surrounds me like a soft pillow

You love me like a father, always there for me

A father who supports, provides and encourages

You love me like a brother,

Always by my side, blessing me

You love me like a husband 

Cherishing all of me

Fulfilling my deepest desires

A fountain of never ending love and affection

You have chosen me before the creation of the world to be Yours

I am saved by faith through Your grace

Undeserved, I, a sinner,

Dead in my transgressions You came and lifted me up

You took my heart of stone and replaced it with a heart of flesh

You gave me Your Spirit as a counsellor 

To lead me and guide me and continue to shape me and mold me

I am Your's, Lord

I surrender all I am to You 

I praise You , oh Lord

For You are the everlasting God, my Saviour

 the plans for me are to bless me and to prosper me, to give me a hope and a future... He is not playing with me, I just need to keep my eyes fixed on Him... trusting Him to bring about what He has for me in His time.. I am choosing to renounce the lies... and stand on the truth... that's right...

... PRIDE........... :S

1 Corinthians 2: 6-7 +14 We do, however, speak a message of wisdom among the mature, but not the wisdom of this age or of the rulers of this age, who are coming to nothing.  No, we declare God’s wisdom, a mystery that has been hidden and that God destined for our glory before time began.

The person without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God but considers them foolishness, and cannot understand them because they are discerned only through the Spirit. 

1 Corinthians 3: 18-20 Do not deceive yourselves. If any of you think you are wise by the standards of this age, you should become “fools” so that you may become wise.  For the wisdom of this world is foolishness in God’s sight. As it is written: “He catches the wise in their craftiness”;  and again, “The Lord knows that the thoughts of the wise are futile.”

 God's wisdom.. foolishness to those that are of this world... Human wisdom... futile in God's eyes...

no wonder I feel so out of place even in the midst of my own family...

can be hard at times, but I would not change it for the world.. the fact that because of the indwelling of the spirit I am able to discern the mind of God... that in fact I have the mind of Christ, it never fails to boggle my mind ;)

this Sunday's sermon... timely after a lengthy meeting dealing with a family "issue"... so futile and leading to destruction..

the world's definition of pride: a feeling or deep pleasure or satisfaction derived from one's own achievements, the achievements of those with whom one is closely associated, or from qualities or possessions that are widely admired

God's definition of pride: ( it is a sin..) the quality of having an excessively high opinion of oneself or one's importance

pride, the source of most sins... the opposite of humility... a stumbling block to living life authentically as a Christian, a follower of Christ, pride... blocking the view of our part in the dysfunction and conflict... keeping us from admitting our sins... ultimately the origin of all rebellion against God...

pride tells us that we deserve happiness, we do not need God, we need to control our own lives and are more than able to, "thank you very much"...
pride fuels insecurity (yes, you read that right) fear of failure.. very closely connected to pride..  who would have thought... ( my fear to make a fool of myself and for people maybe thinking less of me than I want them to, makes me too afraid to step out and bless others with the gifts and talents God gave me... just saying')

pride leads to greed and envy... because of my heightened sense of self, I am SURE I deserve at least as much as the person next to me, and I have to have more and more and more and more..

pride leads to criticism and a judgmental spirit...

rebellion, let's taste the fruit of this tree... then we can be like God... what were they thinking?????????
but : we all deceive ourselves if we think we have no pride..

as Christians, with the Spirit in us, we have a choice, we can go with the fleshly, human rebelliousness and pride... or we can follow Christ and pick up our cross daily... we can choose to consider others as more worthy than ourselves.. like He did, even to death, death on a cross..
we can believe and act on the truth from 1 Corinthians 4 :7 For who makes you different from anyone else? what do you have that you did not receive? and if you did receive it, why do you boast as though you did not...
or we can chose to sin and be no different than those that do not have the mind of Christ...
if we do so we will continue to be missing out on the abundant life He has for us, we will be ineffective.. we will be hypocrites... and we will be of no use to God..
pretty scary... this is not what I want my life to be... so I am asking the Lord daily to search my heart.. and show me any wicked ways within me.. I choose to humble myself, by His strength and grace and follow in His footsteps... one step at a time.. because He is WORTH IT!
#SoliDeoGloria

...sincere love and unity of spirit....

...up early... or should I say in the middle of the night...
praying about what God has been teaching me and my cell group in the last couple of weeks..
unity... accountability question for last week:
I have sincere love for and unity of spirit with each person connected with my church..... HUGE...
when prayerfully considering this question I had to admit that this was not the case...
I have no "real" issue as in unforgivness or conflict with anyone, but, there are a few people I just don't like... they rub me the wrong way... I am not even avoiding them, they are not that close... but I do NOT have sincere love for them..
no worries, I would say maybe there are 3 people I know that would fit that category...
now, as I was praying about that I wondered what it would be that I have to do other than ask God to forgive me and give me that love for these people..
He is a great and wonderful God and when we come to Him with a sincere heart He for sure is going to answer these kind of prayers...
for 2 out of the 3 He showed me that there was one specific thing that had bugged me way back and I had never dealt with it..
I still believe that this is not a matter that needs to be addressed with the person, but it needs to be addressed between me and God...
one of the issues did not even have anything to do with me but I took on a hurt that I perceived was done to  someone .. and again, not close to the person at all, but I "self righteously" couldn't believe this person was doing this.....
wow, I have to say, He is passionate about unity when after at least 8 years or so He brings to mind something that happened in the periphery of my life... it never touched my life.. but I had judged...

in another bible study I am doing I just read another chapter on insecurity and how pride is a big factor in leading us to insecurity.. very interesting concept... pride is always at the core of a judgemental spirit... and so in the case of this one woman in my church that I cannot say without manipulating the truth at least a bit that I love her with a sincere love, I judged because I would have never done this..
funny how I would not allow myself to think this way ever without stopping myself and considering that I, by the grace of God might I not do this specific thing but am guilty of other things that this person
"would NEVER do"... then I usually let it go and thank God for forgiving me for my stuff and let the other of the hook..
either in this one case I wasn't quite there yet or... what probably happened was it was something that just was so minor and removed it didn't even show up on my radar screen...
well, He brought it to mind and I need to confess.. I need to make things right between my God and me and I will ask Him if this is a matter I have to bring before the lady involved or if I just need to let it go..
I am counting on Him to be faithful in this matter...

Unity IS so very very important to Him... maybe this is why I am up at this hour and not sleeping anymore but rather trying to process an event from long ago... that really had nothing whatsoever to do with me...
gotta love Him...

...Remembering the Sacrifice...

... I am an extrovert,   just by one percent though... so, I am also an introvert... I am upbeat and bubbly, but also prone to sadness..
today, as the first snow is falling I am listening to "Prayer for Taylor" on the CD Freedom by Michael W Smith.. and the tears are rolling down my face... a steady stream...
sadness for all those fallen... sadness for what is going on around me.. too close for comfort some of it.., sadness for the 55 million babies killed since Abortion was legalized in the United States... ( don't know the exact number for Canada)
sadness for all those that are in futile pursuit of happiness and peace while dismissing the One who made the biggest sacrifice ever...
sadness because there is so much pain and suffering in this world,
a child dying every minute of hunger, hundreds of thousands of children kidnapped and sold as sex slaves.. abuse, everywhere, in all kinds of different shapes and sizes...
hatred, revenge, jealousy, greed and selfishness...
a broken world...
and then the sun comes out again.. and all makes sense.. the Son came and gave Himself so that there could be healing, that there could be joy even in the midst of suffering, that there could be beauty from ashes... beauty in the turmoil.. a sweet fragrance of knowing and being known, of a love so deep, it touches the deepest corners of my soul... what else is there to wish for...
sadness stays but joy also remains.. and hope..
...but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance;  perseverance, character; and character, hope.  And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.... ( Romans 5:3-5)

He will never disappoint... and so the tears are nothing bad... nothing bad at all... they are an overflow of emotion coming from my soul that knows Him in whom all hope is found... they are tears of sweet surrender to a love so amazing no one can comprehend..... Thankful for the Sacrifice...

...set free... indeed...

..Saturday morning...listening to Michael W. Smith Christmas CD I am marvelling at what my Lord has done for me..



"So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed." (John 8:36)

it is only November 5, and here I have been listening to Christmas music for a few days already..
growing up I had adopted some superstitions from neighbourhood girls... don't pretend, when playing "house" that the father has died, because then he will.... wow... our fathers were on business trips from then on, much safer it seemed..
do not listen to Christmas music other then during advent....or a member of your family will die... huge... never listened to Christmas music outside those 4 weeks before Christmas and after until January 6....

when meeting my Saviour personally in June 1994 I realized that these superstitions were just that... superstitions, and as my pastor has pointed out... it's only potentially bad luck for the black cat that crosses the road in front of your car... because it could be hit..

this year though.. I have taken it another step forward... I am going to decorate my house ( after I clean it ) today... Christmas music has been playing and I am celebrating what my Father in Heaven did for me full force... yes... just love the Christmas season..

I have been set free from so many fears that ruled my life before... fear of flying... fear of my house being broken into at night when my husband wasn't home.. fear of public speaking...

fear is the opposite of faith... so it shouldn't be surprising as my faith grows my fears subside..
it took me reciting Psalm 27 out loud at night before going to bed to overcome the fear of being alone at night.. and reading Psalm 139, just to name one, when my flight was taking off...
today, I pray before I go to sleep, or when on a plane, but I am not afraid anymore... Praise be to God!!

I know I am resting safely in the palm of His hand... He is my refuge and nothing will happen to me other than He allows... even if this potentially could mean things like your husband is leaving you.... He is there with you through it all and you will know Him and who He really is so much more... and this is a blessing far beyond anything you can ever imagine...

so Christmas music it is and Michael W Smith does not disappoint... beautiful songs.....

... pursuing peace... sticking together..

... trouble and conflict, a fact of life, happening whenever there are two or more people relating with each other..
let's look at family.. as in a "social unit".. we all value family ties and we all know that it is not always easy to get along with family members..
family members say things we don't like, do things we think are wrong, family members hurt us, they disappoint us and let us down at some point in time..
if we have a healthy understanding about what family is to be about we will try to work through difficulties and conflicts..we will forgive and reconcile and we will not forsake the get-togethers that are established...

a marriage, another place where conflict is just something that happens.... putting the other first, pursuing peace, working on the relationship and a deep commitment are the ingredients necessary to stay together forever... the heartache and brokenness that follow one spouse's walking away are the fallout of a lack of commitment and otherness ... or we could call it just  plain selfishness...

the whole suffers when one is not committed...
for some reason when thinking about this kind of stuff yesterday, I came to the conclusion that it is the same for church...questions like "how does it make me feel", "am I happy about every decision" and "what am I going to do about conflict"...  are the same questions  that come up  in any other social unit... we call it our "church family" when it gives us that cozy, happy feeling... then, like in any family, stuff happens.... and now the question is  "what will we do"...well, the bible teaches about what to do when there is conflict, it is pretty black and white, clear cut...

it shouldn't surprise us that there are many that walk away from their church family, as much as there are many that walk away from their family, or from their marriage... it makes me sad, because whenever someone walks away there is brokenness... I, like a few friends of mine know exactly how that feels when the one, that is walking away replacing the family with another one, is your husband...

so yesterday, I realized why I am bothered by some of the things that have happened to my church family in the last few years... it is just not meant to be that way.... conflict needs to be resolved, forgiveness sought and extended, peace pursued, togetherness rather than slander and gossip... walking in obedience, sticking with it, accepting suffering... for the greater good... unity.... together making the invisible Christ visible...
we are hindering what God has planned for us if we take the easy way out... and look for "happiness" somewhere else....  that's what my husband did...  and let me tell you, for us, it meant utter despair and deep wounds.... God is still bigger than any of this, but it bothers me anyways... just needed to share this...

just something that came to me yesterday.... I thank the Lord to give me insight.. He definitely clarified something for me there...