Saturday, September 18, 2021

an ocean of sorrow right under my skin





the pain feels like a hollow in my chest 

and I struggle just to take another step

it really is more like a stone in my stomach

like a weight on my heart, 

like a huge rock that will smash it into pieces.

maybe it already did  


when it feels like an ocean of sorrow right under my skin

and tears fill my eyes every second I am alone

a wave that swells and threatens to drown every little bit of joy


when it feels like no one understands

when there is guilt, 

because, come on,  there is so much to be thankful for 

yet


there is so much pain, 

so many layers, 

too many it seems


but. 

this lonely heart will sing again

these barren lungs will breathe again...


in the palm of His hand

because

there is compassion

HOPE

a place to just hide

no guilt or shame for not being able to move beyond the sadness 

a place to just be 

and cry

 and let it all out 

no need to be strong for anyone anymore 

not now anyways

not here anyways

in the embrace of Him

shoulders can come down,

tensions can leave

and there is 

PEACE


all I know is that He loves me 

and I love Him

nothing else matters 


HOPE

His name is

JESUS


my lonely heart can sing again

my barren lungs can breathe again

He carries my sadness

He lovingly wipes away my tears

He is the breath in my lungs

He alone

just Him


He is

LIGHT 

He illuminates the night 

there is warmth,

love,

belonging,

comfort,

joy,

sorrow and suffering 

cannot drown it out


Praise be to HIM

ALONE