..FLEEING from temptation...

for so many years I used to get all teary eyed in church... first because the love of my Lord Jesus Christ was just sinking in and that moved me to tears... Him having saved me from a life lost and broken.. tears of gratitude and awe..
as the years went by finding His comfort on a Sunday morning during worship was so overwhelming and  day to day life so very hard, I was just broken, it seemed His love was like a cocoon.... like a layer of cotton balls all around me and my defences could come tumbling down, at least for a little while...
then, the big trauma and all the many tears that were shed in the months following the demise of my marriage... having been healed from these deep wounds inflicted by betrayal and abandonment I have reached some stability in my life and there haven't been tears in church for a long time...
today.. a different story..
it is just too bad that this life is a journey... yes, it is too bad that there is not something we can reach or achieve or figure out that would leave us just fine for the rest of our lives... on the contrary, when we have figured one thing out we can be sure that God very soon will allow us to recognize another layer of brokenness and difficulty...

I have to admit that I am a little TIRED of this all....
told today that we needed to remember how amazing His grace is when we are just so tired at times that we are tempted to give in and/or up....
a few more lessons from this sermon..need to remember EVERY sin has consequences, both the pain and harm, the scars and the "ripple effect" and the discipline of the Lord... ( we are His children , He loves us and therefore He disciplines us... :S ) ..
need to remember I am VULNERABLE, and you can say that out loud... especially if I think I am far beyond all that "sinful stuff".. duh...
He does provide an escape... with Him I can choose to say no and stand firm, or just FLEE... relying on Him I will be able to endure the temptation and by His grace eventually will move beyond this specific sin...
and.. last but not least, I do have to remember that the evil one is the one that is behind the temptation... he is the one that wants to trip me up, ruin what the Lord is doing through me, my testimony, the glory I by His grace can bring to His name.......
pheeewwww.....
my sin.... in a nutshell.. being discontent with where He has me... shoot... so far not able to conquer this one, but with Him I know I can.. eventually...
because this is true: No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. and God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. but when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. ( 1 Corinthians 10:13 )