... loving well 2....

...love and respect... different roles... God given.... totally lost in today's society... but so crucial, so life changing when lived out in a marriage...
during the many years of trying to make my marriage work I learned so many good and helpful things.. the fact that a man needs to be respected and a woman needs to be loved and feel secure deep inside is one of those principles that God has given us in His Word.
a man that lives to please God, who puts his wife's needs before his own (Phil 2:3-4 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves,  not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.) laying his life down for his wife daily... who as a woman wanting to obey God wouldn't want to respect and honor a husband that treats her this way? Submitting to him , trusting him, trusting God... such freedom to be found in this.
God is the one who made us and designed marriage... shouldn't He know what is most needed?
wondering why he asks the man to love and the woman to respect? it's because he knows that for a man respect comes easily and love is something a woman has less problems with... therefore He calls us to what is harder for us to achieve, what we need to focus on more...

I look around and see my wonderful life

Almost perfect from the outside

In picture frames I see my beautiful wife

Always smiling

But on the inside, I can hear her saying...

“Lead me with strong hands

Stand up when I can't

Don't leave me hungry for love

Chasing dreams, what about us?

Show me you're willing to fight

That I'm still the love of your life

I know we call this our home

But I still feel alone”

I see their faces, look in their innocent eyes

They're just children from the outside

I'm working hard, I tell myself they'll be fine

They're independent

But on the inside, I can hear them saying...

“Lead me with strong hands

Stand up when I can't

Don't leave me hungry for love

Chasing dreams, but what about us?

Show me you're willing to fight

That I'm still the love of your life

I know we call this our home

But I still feel alone”

So Father, give me the strength

To be everything I'm called to be

Oh, Father, show me the way

To lead them

Won't You lead me?

To lead them with strong hands

To stand up when they can't

Don't want to leave them hungry for love,

Chasing things that I could give up

I'll show them I'm willing to fight

And give them the best of my life

So we can call this our home

Lead me, 'cause I can't do this alone

Father, lead me, 'cause I can't do this alone

(Sanctus Real)

Love this song... it's a high calling.... but isn't it worth it? Nothing of any worth in this world is easy,  with Him all things are possible and let me tell you.... I wish we both had worked on this more.. because on this side of the equation... mainly brokenness and scars... my prayer is for the men to take the lead... and the women to follow... glorifying God together and with His help living in a marriage that endures whatever comes it's way....

.... reflection....

this is the last day of my old year... a very dear friend suggested I follow his daughter's example and celebrate 3 days in a row... works for me... so here we go...
considering that each day is a gift from the Lord and He is the one to give me breath I need to thank Him for this last year...

I thank you Lord for these last 364 days
I thank you for new mercies every morning
I thank you for your grace and strength for every day
I thank you for my children who bring to my life laughter, joy and a love that makes my heart overflow
I thank you for my friends.. each one of them is a blessing to me
each one of them has been Christ to me and helped me carrying my burden
I thank you for the support my family has been to me, without their generosity our life would not be the same
I thank you for reconciled relationships,
I thank you for  your strength, grace and comfort when I needed to extend forgiveness,
I thank you for the fact that we could separate and work all issues out in fairness, I thank you that we can be friends now and that I can rely on my Ex husband for the support we need
I thank you for your presence when I have been lonely,
I thank you for your healing, your warm embrace and your presence with me always,
I thank you that you have revealed yourself to me in so many wonderful new ways,
I thank you for your unfailing love ministering to me when I felt rejected and trampled,
I thank you for the joy that I could find in your presence,
I thank you for new horizons and the plans that you have for me, plans to prosper me and not to harm me, plans to give me a hope and a future, even when I couldn't imagine it,
I thank you for the purpose you have for me and my girls,
I thank you that you are allowing me to invest myself into the lives of others, Lord,
I thank you for the way you have been stretching me through this last year..
challenging me to trust you like never before,
I thank you for allowing me to lose my security in my husband, finances and family,
because it allowed me to find my security in you more than ever before,
I thank you Lord for allowing the sin of others to bring me closer to you, because you alone are my joy and my salvation,
through this you have taught me to fix my eyes on you, cling to you for all that I need....
I praise you, for your plans are wonderful,
I thank you for walking with me through the valley,
for leading me into the light... for your faithfulness and love and mercy...
You are my all and all... I love you with all my heart, soul , mind and strength...
Amen