..unmarried.. not by choice...

....Now for the matters you wrote about: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.”  But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband.  The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband.  The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife.  Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.  I say this as a concession, not as a command.  I wish that all of you were as I am. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.
Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do.  But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion....
(1 Corinthians 7:1-9)

this week's passage.. have known this one very well for a very long time..  my situation has changed, and sorry, I have to say it again, but I never thought it would... and so this week so far I have tried to avoid  dwelling on it.. the thing is though I just can't...

always having embraced the teaching in this passage wholeheartedly , the last verse is now what is directed to me.. I am the "unmarried" or even the"widow" in some sense... sucks, is all I can say..

not sure how to reconcile this with the calling to be content in all circumstances, to trust and be obedient no matter what's happening around us.. interesting to see that Paul acknowledged there could be something like a burning passion being too much of a temptation to stand up against.. then again it says we will never be tempted by more than we can handle ... self control, a fruit of the spirit... and still... he says, better get married than to burn with passion and subsequently sin... ha... not that easy..

not a decision to be made by just one... thinking about this, and what I am longing for, a man that loves the Lord like I do, a man that would be the spiritual leader, who I could learn from and who would be as excited about what the Lord is doing as I am, a man that loves me  and cherishes me, accepts me and is willing to stand by me for the rest of our lives here no matter what.. someone able to feel as deeply as I do, someone who knows what forgiveness is and knows how to give it and receive it.. someone who will be good to my children and who will understand my background and will be familiar with the kind of life I have had all along... so this week, getting a little depressed, I wondered what made me think that there will be a man like this... truth is, the only few I know that are like this are committed, married men... and I am rejoicing for them and their wives...  so, I would love to be married so that I would not be tempted, but unless God brings this man into my life it will be just me.....

so really, I need to focus on some other scriptures.. those about obedience, self control and trust... hope.. and focusing on what is eternal, not temporal... living in the temporal my eyes sometimes wander... and then I get sad and hopeless...
so, for all my married friends... live this passage, embrace it, both men and women... lest Satan will tempt you..  and we all know where this leads.. give yourself lovingly to your spouse... after all, it is a great gift, designed by God.. and all that comes from Him is GOOD...